Day 34 of lockdown and feeling awfully alone. Some days I don’t hear my voice out loud (not at the talking to myself stage just yet!). I’ve seen my grandchildren though a window a couple of times and as I saw them most days before this, it’s really hard not to be with them. To be honest, I’m having some less than good moments and its not always easy to snap out of them.
Although I am used to living alone, I hadn’t realised just how much contact I had with people every day. I miss having my grandchildren sleep over twice a week, I miss the regular contact with my family and friends, and I miss being able to visit family in the states. I miss my walking group and our chats. I miss sharing a glass of wine with a neighbour. I miss the contact with people when I’m teaching courses.
So, what am I doing to cope with being awfully alone?
I’m keeping busy, that’s what. I can’t change the situation so I’m using it to develop. I’m decluttering like a demon. I’m creating structured plans for my businesses and taking advantage of all the free training that is out there. I’m even catching up on all the books I’ve bought but not got round to reading!
Through this I’m learning so much – I think that my mind is really open to new ideas and thinking at the moment and I’ve had some really big mindset shifts. I can feel myself growing both personally (must cut out the snacks!!) and professionally so while this is a difficult time for us all, in some ways its been amazing and I know I’ll never have the chance for this focused development time again.
What am I learning? Personally, that material things matter much less than family and friends. That I have more than enough stuff, in some cases too much (into the charity bag). I go for a brisk 30-minute walk at 6am every day, and this is such a positive start to my day that it makes the rest of the day more productive and constructive. I definitely get so much more done during the day and I do feel healthier!
Professionally I have learned that I do know what I’m doing which is reassuring for someone who has had impostor syndrome for much of her life! I’m learning that its ok to aim for B- instead of A+ if it gets the job done. As they say, done is better than perfect! In the past I’ve wasted so much time making sure everything is perfect that by the time it is finished to my high standards, I’ve either lost interest or someone else has put out a less perfect version that has grabbed the marked! I’m also learning the value of doing things in the right order, in the past I have tended to do things in completely random orders, no structure whatsoever, and then I wonder why the outcome is not what I’d hoped. Taking time to creating a structure is now part of my plan for all work. I also know I don’t have to go it alone, asking for advice or help is now a given, not something shameful or a sign of weakness. If my bathroom taps need fixing, I automatically call Ben the Plumber, I wouldn’t try to change them myself, so why in business have I held back from asking for tech support or help with my branding or anything that is not my forte? I now think “how can I do this and who can help”, not “I can’t do that, I’ll give up”. Big lesson learned there, and time saved too!
So, all in all, as awful as this situation is, with a bit of open mindedness and planning, I can make it work for me and hit the ground running when its all back to normal!